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Day 3,Today’s assignment from writing 201..Another challenge.A Prose poem about Skin,Using internal rhyme.Yet another attempt from my side,to do the assignment.:)
A tattoo on her skin.
Waiting all day long broke all the walls that she made so strong! Even though they were never much help…
Hope played games of come and go! Fear of failure was starting to grow.
If she lost, going home was a nightmare. Her father would be waiting by the stairs.
The belt in his hand would be waiting eagerly, to unite with her scarred skin’s agony.
Now, the bells in her heart were in full speed! Hearing a NO, and she wouldn’t breathe. As that would mean -going home -facing her dad -getting another scar on her sleek hands. To show. To cherish, to remember. A lesson for her little brother.
Unable to linger around in torment, the girl started trembling like the last leaf on a dying tree. She wanted to learn her fate and be free, from all this uncertainty.
Then came out the list of students admitted to college. She slowly walked to the notice board that seemed miles away. Her mom said, “Quickly pray!”
The last moments were here, all the students pushed each other around. They were all in a hurry. The ones who looked at the list were left astound. Her dark skin felt rushing pain. With each push, and poke, more gain -in her misery.
The already worn off skin of an eighteen-year-old started bleeding the tales of each whip and lash, given to her by her very own dad.
Even when her mighty skin surrendered. She made it to the board to see her Last grade.
Her name was there. The ninth one to be exact. She made it on the list. Daddy won’t bash!
Happiness filled the vessel of abuse. She slowly walked to her mom -the women with more scars than her own.
Mommy looked at her and screamed! That was the last of her, the unnamed girl and her skin that bleeds, that was the last of the deeds, that she ever paid for -with a new tattoo on her skin.
-Sabah Batul.
IshmaImroz said:
wow… this is truly an awesome theme and a huge reality.. Being an Indian myself.. I know of many parent’s who’ve been through the same! the way of expression is fabulous .. It made me walk with her in the journey she made to the board and feel the agony of awaiting her results!! May God bless your pen for pointing out the violence she has been through!! It was as if you actually expressed your own story.. it seemed so real I mean!
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you so much for that!
Yes,I have come across many parents who do this.And it is the worse thing to do,to a gift given by God ,to them.And the pressure with studies now days is enough to break a person!
I went through admissions too.And it was scary.And I couldn’t have done it without the love and support of my parents! Thank God for them.
I can only pray for the kids who suffer due to,their parents.Hopefuly they would change someday!
Thank you for your comment,it was very kind of you:)
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IshmaImroz said:
True said My dear sister.. I too have faced them but unlike this situation mY parents were always with me through out! 😉 Thank God is All I have to say!
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SabahBatul. said:
Yes….Thank God !
Have a good day ahead.:0
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IshmaImroz said:
hehe .. u to! waiting for tomorrow.. Lolz.. Gud night!
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SabahBatul. said:
Gn:)
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Susan Langer said:
Great poem that uses prose to tell your story. I like the imagery, the suspense, the internal rhyme. My favorite line was “Trembling like the last leaf,on a dying tree.She wanted to learn her fate,and be free.From all this uncertainty”.
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you so much for that!! 🙂
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Susan Langer said:
🙂
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Al The Author said:
There’s a real energy to this. Interesting read!
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you:)
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jacquelineobyikocha said:
That was quite gripping!
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SabahBatul. said:
I am happy you like it 🙂
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writersdream9 said:
I just don’t have the words to express how moved I am from this! I couldn’t stop reading!
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you so much for that!!! I am really happy you like it:)
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clcouch123 said:
This is a powerful narrative that leaves your reader wanting more. Which is just right. Hearing the mother scream, knowing that the father awaits, and we await with the protagonist to know her fate. Tension and engagement. Great qualities to have evoked. Well done!
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you so much for those kind words!! I am really happy you liked it 😀
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nimitode said:
This is so goood! 👌
(Have you any interest in travel, do check my travel blog)
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you…and yes I do..!
Will check it out:)
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lavanya99 said:
Enchanting..n so very close to reality. Really nice!
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you:)
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lavanya99 said:
My pleasure!:-)
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archana235 said:
Sadd! Had me hooked though. Beautifully expressed! 🙂
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you 🙂
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cb hanek said:
Just when I thought I couldn’t feel any worse about the narrated events, you shared the mother’s fate. What a powerful poem. God bless you!
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you for those kind words 🙂
I am happy you liked it..!
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IshmaImroz said:
Your posts are truly one to look forward to..And hence when I got the chance,I just had to nominate you for The one lovely blogger award.
For more details….
Have a good day ahead 🙂 haha I did a copy paste .. forgive me for it! 😛
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SabahBatul. said:
No problem…..I will read it:)
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IshmaImroz said:
haha sweetie 😀
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SabahBatul. said:
🙂
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beryltreesareus said:
Reading through your blog on skin. loved the image of the last leaf too – felt the fear in the scream and sorrow that this happens.
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SabahBatul. said:
Thank you so much for reading it,and the encouraging comment.Yes it is scary that this is happening somewhere right now!
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ranu802 said:
Thank you Sabah for dropping by. 🙂
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SabahBatul. said:
Your welcome:)
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